I’m fortunate in visiting a number of schools of different types. One of the things I see time and time again is students that have switched off and don’t feel any sense of belonging to the school in question. Part of the problem is often the curriculum these students are given, and the way it is presented. However a huge problem in many schools is the relationship between the teacher and students. In many cases this is none existent! I can’t say I’ve seen many excellent lessons where there hasn’t been a positive relationship between teacher and students.
Students want to connect – with each other and the adults in school. For a teacher connecting with students doesn’t mean being friends with them, it means showing an interest and sharing a little of yourself. This is even more important for students who might be carrying baggage or issues to school with them. For some students coming to school is the best part of their day – and the connections they make here matter to them a great deal. As a special school teacher, I work with students who have a limited circle of friends and don’t always have the same experiences outside of school that mainstream students take for granted. They look on in disbelief when they find out that I have a mum, or that I spent Saturday morning doing my shopping in Asda – but the little things dropped into conversation help build the relationship between them and me.
When I visit other schools the students are keen to learn more about my school, and when I go back for follow up visits the conversation continues – they just want to connect. It’s in their nature – they are curious, inquisitive, nosey and programmed to learn. They share information about themselves in the process and I learn useful information about their perceptions of their school, their lessons and their life in general – and at the same time forging a positive relationship with them.
I remember being told “Don’t smile until Christmas” when I started teaching. What utter twaddle! I would argue that a teacher who doesn’t smile isn’t connecting with his/her students. It is possible to maintain boundaries, command respect and be consistent with behaviour and still smile – would you want to be taught by a teacher who is all stick and no carrot?
So how do I connect with students? One thing I do is change the wall paper on my laptop to a photograph of something I’ve done recently. I’ve had photos of my dog, photos of my axolotl, landscape pictures and even science photos from lessons or the news. One week I even planned a science investigation using dog hair donated by my dog. Students are quick to ask questions about them and it kick starts the connecting process. Similarly students often want to share information about things or experiences they’ve had (often at inappropriate times) – don’t dismiss them but value their comments, even refer to them later if you can.
Try it for yourself. Connect with your students – and let me know how it goes!
